It's Friday and I don't know which end is up

I love Fridays.  Both boys are in school, I usually have time to run, I tend to finish up projects so I can relax more on the weekend, and it’s generally a family night with the boys.  This week I’m not feeling it. 

It’s been an up and down week, with a general current of unrest running underneath it.  I should be thankful, my husband has had 4 days of work this week, and the promise of a couple weeks at another job starting Monday!  This is great news, meaning the black finance cloud that made it’s presence known again last weekend should be moving a bit further away :)  It helps but the current is still there.

Him getting that job pretty much means I have to scrap my hopes of hitching a ride to Canada next weekend to visit friends I haven’t seen in ages, and that bites but I hadn’t let myself count on it yet.  Still hoping, but looking for a way where we can all go together.  I’m relieved in one sense, it’s simpler not to make all the arrangements, and it means I can still go to Fynn’s potluck for his class next week which I am looking forward to.

I think the itch is the one I get periodically, and it’s been a long time this time.  I get desperate for something big to change, as it puts everything else into perspective and shakes up lots of stuff that is hard to see unless it gets rocked somehow.  Know what I mean?  Rather like being forced to clean out my fridge as it’s malfunctioning, and getting to find/throw away all kind of stuff.  Maybe I just get bored easily?  Bored with jobs, with places I live, with situations that never seem to change.  I used to use big trips to get my ‘shakeup’ and it worked really well … immersion in something so Other that I saw myself more clearly, and got lots of ideas.  I can’t do that right now, though I’d LOOOOVE to. 

So last week I subscribed us to the Caretaker Gazette, and we’re looking to see what comes up.  It may be a strange way to scratch an itch, but it’s definitely a way to change things suddenly, and it could bring us a way to get out of the city and start something new.  I know there are unfinished things here in Brooklyn, and I’m starting to name them as I find them, but it does feel like the time to move on is certainly close. 

I don’t think the itch has been helped by the new year and the new administration either, in the sense that Change! and Resolve! are great ways to crank up the engine, but if you’re not sure what’s going to happen when you press the gas, it’s a little intimidating. 

I am glad it’s Friday, but wish I could see the next few steps a little more clearly.  Hope your week has been clearer!  Don’t forget to answer the question of the week before tomorrow night :).