postcards from the road

We finally got out of town on Sunday, after the usual mad before-a-trip scramble.  I never can get organized enough to have a peaceful departure, finally just ok with it and learning to nap in the car to catch up.  We’re road tripping/and family reunioning for 10 days, and so far it’s been really amazing.  Bits of six states the first day and 3 yesterday, but it’s less crazy from here on out.  A few pics below to give you a taste.  Being away from the city, together but not visiting anyone … it’s been a couple of years since we’ve had even a day of that and it’s bliss.

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Summer's here, and I think I have two heads

There’s no question that summer is here, at least in attitudes and clothing choices.  Pools aren’t open yet, but layers have been shed, windows are open, and everyone is lingering outside later and later.  I’m feeling the pressure of a chaotic series of trips and complicated schedules, trying to finish up schooling and get everyone and everything organized so that we can leave on time.  Some days I think my head is rolling around under the bed collecting dust bunnies, and other days I’m yelling at the boys to stop making weird noises and find something to do already!

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Q of the Week: What is/was your relationship with your mom like?

Fynn’s dinner plan, which didn’t actually get made in the end, he opted for soup. Can you guess what it is?*Mother’s Day is over, I hope yours was a good one?  The highlight of mine was my boys making me both breakfast and dinner, which I thoroughly enjoyed.  A brief nap in the sun in the backyard was also delightful!

I know the day can be fraught with many things, if you’ve lost your own mom or a child, or long for kids, or whatever your burden may be, I hope there was joy in it somewhere.  In thinking about all that I got to wondering what your relationship with your own mom is, or what did it used to be?  I know it’s likely to run the gamut, and changes over time, but I’m really curious.  Best friends and first person you call?  Brief contact?  None at all? 

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Happy Mother's Day to you all!

… and I hope it is truly a happy one, I know the day can be rough for many.  May yours be exactly the way you hope, whether it’s spent alone or normally or with gifts and pampering.  A day to acknowledge the mothering you do, and the mothering you’ve had.  Both potent, important, and worth celebrating. 

We’ve come a long way, baby.  Happy Mother’s Day!

Community, resentment, and connecting the dots

Stumbling across The BadAssMama Chronicles site yesterday got me thinking. In particular, this post about resenting changes hit home, and I started connecting the dots between some things that have been swirling around in my head lately.  Community, and how it works (or not) in today’s society.  Resentment and frustration (mine particularly) and what’s been causing it.  More things that came to me in the shower this morning, and I hope come back before I’m done writing.  I’m not the only one who thinks best in the shower, am I? 
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finding beauty in the fragments

April’s almost over, and I’ve felt a bit like I’m floating above the surface of things most of the month.  Not quite grounded, not quite flying, just a wee bit untethered.  I’m guessing it has to do with the recent possibility that we might actually be moving out of the city before the year is out.  Something we’ve longed for for years, but not found a way to accomplish until recently. 
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pictures from my week

once again the words are stuck, pictures are all i have for now.  my heart’s been heavy with thoughts of trayvon.  my time occupied with helping my husband move out of his studio, and prepping to once again have guests in our frontroom.  the purge of stuff continues on several fronts, so there’s a stoop sale in the near future and the boys can’t wait.  weather warms, spring catapults forward at a lovely but disturbing rate, and i gather things to be thankful for as armor for my days. 
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Q: Do you find time to play?

Quick question to start of the week, it’s been awhile since I asked one.  Do you give yourself time to play?  I mean relaxing and enjoyable time to do fun and maybe whimsical things, like your kids do every time they get a chance.  I don’t just mean getting down on the floor to build block towers with them, but doing something playful for your own enjoyment. 

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Friday roundup, which stalled in the starting gate ...

Here we are, another Friday, and I’ve not posted all week.  Can’t say why really.  Some of the things running through my head though, for your random pleasure …

Am I hitting the edges of menopause, God help me, and if so am I really really done having kids?  Hm?  Really?  Not 100% sure, but close, still that shred of doubt makes me wonder if and when I’ll regret it.

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D, sick, at age 2. One of my entries in Kizz’s LEAP Photo Challenge which is open till Tuesday, and for every entry she’ll donate $10 to the American Cancer Society. Deets at the bottom of her post. Reason it’s a LEAP if you click the pic and read the description.If there’s anything consistent about this blog, it’s that I’m not consistent.  I’m up and down and verbose and silent, sometimes chipper and often wry and deprecating and full of wishes and hopes and aches and pains.  There is it.

The past two weeks have been quiet achey ones.  I’m not sure why, but have been letting it roll over me.  Lack of energy has been the theme, with an undercurrent of pms, some reflection, and a lot of distraction with obsessive show watching, late-night reading, and delightful new indie-music listening. Kind of hunkering down and letting the quietness pervade. 

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Words are swirling, but I can seem to match their gelling up with time at the keyboard.  Clients call, boys leave on planes (one of mine, that is, alone, and yes he’s old enough and so am i but oh the apron strings that tangle and yes appear magically out of thin air, where did they come from?) and cats need to be rescued from porches.  The cryptic title up there?* Any guesses? 

I’ll be back, soon.



I might be a holiday grinch, but my kids sure get into it and I can’t help but join in in some capacity :).  D made me a lego heart, and drew out a detailed set of directions on how to play the online game he’s been obsessing about the last few weeks.  Sharing the love :).  Rather ironic that the game is called Motherlode I think.  I’m trying to get into it, because he so badly wants to me to like it as much as he does!

I hope your day is a lovely one, and that your heart is full and your mind settled. Love to you all!


because parenting is about breaking AND building

the usual level of chaos in my boys’ room …The banner image above came from this lovely shot of my boys’ room the other day, as they were documenting the destruction of a large block tower.  Destroying it by shooting it down with a bow and arrow, or course.  They build, they destroy.  They build, they destroy.  It’s a pretty endless cycle, and one that drives my let’s-do-something-and- finish-it mentality right up the wall.  I don’t like mess and clutter, I never have.  Well, not since I had my own place anyway, don’t ask my mom about the state of my room when I was in my teens as you might get a different story!  It never looked like this though, I can guarantee that. 
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Monday Meme : Give Me 5?

Found this walking home from the park yesterday … had to laugh!I’ve been a little down and prone to navel-gazing lately, so decided to lighten up a bit today.  It is warmish and sunnyish after all, and while I might be hoping for a good foot of snow to play in, I’m not too bummed that I can still wear my flip-flops when I run to the corner store!

Five quick questions for you, in no particular order …

1. Current or most recent book read?

2. Right-handed or left?

3. Number of years you’ve been a mom?

4. Worst sickness/injury you’ve ever had?

5. Fictional character you most identify with?

Thanks, and happy Monday!

Boron, Silicon, and Carbon; patterning my week

Silly Putty, in case you’re wondering …“You’re never excited about ANYthing, Mom!”  His words hit me like a ton of bricks.  I don’t remember what they were a response to, it probably involved some comment I’d made sarcastically about being thrilled about some project I had to work on that related to him somehow.  I know, not a comment I should have been making in the first place, great way to make them feel like crap.
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